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Honest Network Slogans

CBS: Give up on life with us.

NBC: Soulless with edge.

FOX: A place for rage.

ABC: Somehow dumber.

HBO: Not porn, not not porn.

AMC: You want bleak? We’ll give you bleak.

Comedy Central: It’s a long way down.

The CW: Now with more vampires!

BET: Proudly dividing the African-American community against itself.

PBS: Supported by viewers like you. And herein lies the problem.

BBC: Not as good as you’d think.

A&E: Watch people store their stuff while you work out.

Lifetime: That’s how long it will feel like.

MTV: Making people worse since 1981.

Spike: Not Lee. Because you were totally thinking that.

Syfy: Why being a nerd is sometimes purely a bad thing.

TBS: You owe us for constantly playingGroundhog Day in your youth.

VH1: Just take up drugs. Seriously.

7/1/2013