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Signs Your Host Might Be Batman
When you ask if you can use the upstairs bathroom, your host answers 'Raz al Gul is dead...I saw him die.' While introducing you to another guest, your host’s eyes dart furtively but unmistakably towards the bat signal. When a caterer inadvertently drops a tray of champagne glasses, the impact is depicted by a colorful bubble reading ‘BLAM!’ Your host disappears for long enough to concern the guests, and when you spread out to search the house, each of you is picked off one by one before landing a single shot. Acclaimed film director Christopher Nolan can be clearly seen blocking your host’s movements. |
As he takes you on a brief tour of the house, your host proudly shows off a den that includes a bar, two bar stools, a pool table, a neon beer sign, a leather couch, a lazy boy, and advanced ballistics equipment, checking himself visibly when he calls it his ‘man cave’. A flock of bats is suddenly released into the dining room during the salad course, and your host rises stoically in their midst while framed in blue light. Superman is slain during the cheese course. Tim Burton seems dismayed at your host’s rejuvenated success as an entertainer. |
When, over coffee and dessert, a guest tells an extended anecdote that captivates the assembled, your host interrupts him at the offhand phrase ‘I swear to God’ by suddenly screaming ‘SWEAR TO ME!’ Your host grossed over a billion dollars internationally and is widely recognized as one of the all-time greatest blockbuster franchises. To bring the evening to a close, your host makes a drunken toast disparaging the guests, but given that you're all super villains vying to destroy Gotham City, you feel sympathetic to his position and offer to show him a magic trick. |
11/1/2015